Startled by Existence

April 4, 2002

to Kerry, my beloved (12 years in)

I’ll break down, if that’s what it takes … I’ll be weak if it shows your strength … and I’ll be glad, at the end of the exchange if You are all that’s left.

Maggie B, -- All that’s Left, from the extrorinary album “What Kind of Love”)

It’s a strange thing,

launching landing-pads into the future,

for a rocket ship

still in the box.

 

Who were we

to say “I do”

having never done.

Who were we to know

that “for better or for worse”

might really mean the “worse”

and a little of the poorer.

 

Who were we to know

that we would need

every ounce of promise

(and some carnal pride)

to keep us through the nights

of hurricane and ice.

Who were we

to know, that we didn’t know

a thing of love

or the poverty of self.

 

Who were we

that we didn’t know,

that we could be

so damn-right selfish

or perverse.

Indeed, Who were we

to think we had it in us --

To shine, were other folks

had tripped,

or ripped in two.

 

But here we are

facing the descent -

together,

falling at a future

that we dreamed

would be our future from the start.

Could it be

that I have come to love

My Love.

 

Could it be

that we have tasted mercy.